Finding our victim voice is easier. No one likes to be a perpetrator. More so if you are in the development or aid sector. You start working for benefit of the other and gradually, unconsciously, begin to represent them. Their voices become illustrations in your stories. Their stories become case studies.
Reality is messy and multiple. The solidarity in struggles is real. The transformative stories of change are real. The echo becoming the voice is equally real.
Work in the social sector, for those of us from privileged sections of society, is not just about making the world a better place. It is about putting our privilege to work. Society works to keep caste invisible. It is upto each individual to accept their status as beneficiaries of this broken system. Lifting the veil over our own history brings shame and pain. Institutions have developed sophisticated ways to cope with these difficult feelings.
Think about this. Any PPT you have made, which is worth its slides contains photos of farmers, students, children and mothers. Their identity, often nameless, becomes an exhibit in an argument you need to make. You, a beneficiary of the system, are unconsciously appropriating identity of the oppressed, to make a point about their needs and how you are going to be helping them. In the process, there are usually benefits – additional funds may get allocated, enabling policies may be formulated. One may argue that there is no misuse, it is for greater benefit after all. But such representation is fitting their voice in your narrative.
How is this voice placed on platforms? As ‘voices from the field’. A space for being heard is created, which is then deliberated by ‘panelists’. This does contribute to new insights for those in the room and a new experience for those sharing their experiences. These voices also add to the increased credibility of the event as one that presents all perspectives. When was the last time you attended a conference organized by those from the community, where you were ‘voice from the field’ and panelists later talked in another language?
So, why are these boundaries so difficult to transcend?
Insights are “takeaways” – you can package them and take them back home. Transformation can’t be packaged. It is where exchange happens – emotional or intellectual. something shifts. By segregation of community representatives and ‘sectoral experts’, space for dialogue and opportunity for transformation is lost. Status quo is, unconsciously, maintained.
Does this imply that development efforts don’t change anything? Change happens. It happens in pockets, fabric of society remains lightly challenged, largely unchanged. Change happens in villages and in communities. It happens in another world , far from the offices of the development actors.
If a caste analysis was to be done on staff of philanthropies or nonprofits, we can expect to see the pyramid to be largely lower caste and female at the lower rungs, upper caste and male in leadership and power. This is in line with the trends in public institutions. Three out of four anchors of flagship debates on television are upper caste. No more than 5 percent of all articles in English newspapers are written by Dalits or adivasis. A study of a digital inclusion project showed that content creators were rarely from the Adivasi community.
‘But I work for others, the marginalised’. This used to be a solace for me, to explain my own personal stand in this unequal world. 2020 has revealed how structural inequality is unconsciously hidden, often behind good intentions. I now examine my intention. Am I here to create a legacy? Am I here to put my privileges to work? To be a change agent, I need to actively seek out and embrace the discomfort that transformational spaces bring.
“naach na aaye angan tedha” – an old Indian adage. Don’t blame the stage, if you don’t know how to dance. It captures the deeply feudal or fatalistic thinking of India. It puts individual capacity above a broken system. The stage cannot change, dancer should kindly adjust and learn to dance on slippery slope. A development sector professional who has accepted their own status as beneficiaries of this broken system, will begin to see more spaces for drawing attention to the slope, not just the dance. Baggage of one’s own caste and class privilege must be unbundled and explored on the road less travelled.
Thoughts. Insights. Action 
Fantastic piece of writing Vartika Jaini.
‘When was the last time you attended a conference organized by those from the community, where you were ‘voice from the field’ and panelists later talked in another language?’ – ways in which dignity and self respect can be sucked out, to serve one’s own needs.
Insights are “takeaways” – you can package them and take them back home. Transformation can’t be packaged. It is where exchange happens – emotional or intellectual. something shifts. – wow.
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thanks Uma! What didnt come to me, till you pulled that line out, insight is personal and transformation mutual! A very lived experience from the eGRC with you!
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Dear Vartika, I read and watch my inner process while reading. I catch myself wincing, catch pictures flashing through of similar scenes from my life that you write about. My response in the path has been to become quieter in the external world and feel guilt and apologetic. But I know that is not the answer. Being a “social development professional”, so what is the answer to feeling guilty and withdrawing? To explore frankly openly my process? Its not easy. But if each one of us sets off on the internal path and share it we will be the change we wish to see. Thank you for writing this, Vartika. Anuradha Prasad
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Thanks for sharing this Anu. I feel encouraged. Acknowledging is the first step yes. A friend pointed out and I realized too – that just exploration is self indulgence. It has to change. One needs to actively begin to put ones privileges to work. How can one create space for leadership and engagement rather than fitting into our narrative? It is, as you say, on individuals to do that.
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Dear Vartika,
Thanks for this thoughtful piece of writing. Despite it being brief, you have touched upon so many issues. Reading it triggered off several thoughts. Sharing some here.
One of the issues that you write about and which strikes me is the question of representation. It immediately reminded me of Ambedkar and Gandhi’s stand off on the matter between 1930-1932 in the context of constitutional reforms. Ambedkar wanted a separate electorate for dalits so that they could represent themselves and their interests. According to Gandhi, dalits were subsumed in the Hindu fold and therefore did not need separate electorates. Gandhi saw the question of caste and untouchability as a sin and not a flaw of Hinduism. A sin to be atoned by upper caste Hindus by taking actions to uplift dalits. Gandhi saw no role for dalits in their own liberation other than being recipients of the largesse of the upper castes.
In my opinion, the difference between the two perspectives is the difference between 1. a person letting go of one’s privilege and creating space for those who have faced systemic oppression and 2. putting one’s privilege to work. The former has the capacity to create transformation, while the later can only create a notional improvement in the lives of a few people who have faced oppression while maintaining status quo. The challenge to some of us then is to what extent am I willing to let go of my privilege?
In a leadership development process that I was a part of, participants were discussing myths of leadership in NGO cultures. One of the several which came up and which I felt I subscribed to was ‘Being a victim or a survivor makes you a good leader’. The corollary of this being, if one has not faced oppression one cannot exercise their leadership effectively for a particular issue. I think I have used this to judge people and also as an excuse to not mobilise myself to intervene in some contexts. Maybe because of the fear of confronting my, even if small unintended role, in perpetuating that oppression due to privileges I have been born into / have access to and location in society.
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Dear Swathi,
It made me examine what I was really saying? Just make your privilege work or make space? Saying it with the context you do, I see how putting privilege to work may continue to be a me-centric view of the world that actually colludes with the structural and systemic oppression. Like giving away food and taking pictures. That is a powerful question you have left me with. What extent am I willing to let go of my privilege?
It’s a thin line one has to watch for and it will be really revealed in action! One has to watch ones intent very closely and ultimately how much are your actions shifting something in you (as much as in the other). One has to learn to be an ally. The unbundling of baggage of privilege can be for that end, not to serve oneself alone.
Thanks again Swati.
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can one really let go of ones privilege ? I wonder. I think a lot of it is not within yor control, because it is not so much about what you do as it is about how you are treated or received. It’s a relational concept in many ways. One can be aware, and try not to abuse one’s privilege at best.
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Privilege allows a certain access and voice. Can one step aside from these for oneself, for example… actively use your channel for other voices to be heard and develop their own connections, in a way that it also shifts something for you. Not just give away “your” spot. That’s how I am trying to make sense of it rose…
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vartika, first of all congratulations on the ‘its now or never stance’- this need for a perfect anything is half the problem isn’t it? There is a lovely Len Cohen song – forget your perfect offering – there is a crack in everything- that’s how the light gets in. This stance of ‘on behalf of’ itself is steeped in a kind of hidden hierarchy, where we assume we are better equipped to articulate, communicate. The issue of very little work done on second-line leadership in the NGO sector is another worrying set of evidence – no one can lead or care as much as me. In the last few months – the fact that we just do not believe there is a local tier of governance, or that it is important to engage in it and allow it to function. Maybe if we turned the flow of resources upside down – like those maps where you suddenly change it from eurocentric to pacific centric!
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🙂 it was your first offering to me in a raag rose! Perfection is a fantasy and a defence and I was like nooo…. Taken me many years to get to agree!! Here’s to many such new maps!! It is seed of a lovely project idea Rose!!
Here’s a link to the song https://youtu.be/c8-BT6y_wYg
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Lucidly written Virtika, thank you for sharing. You have touched many areas, privilege, appropriation, transformation, judgement – each of it in itself is a deep topic to think and look at where one is in relation to them. I struggle with privilege as it has many shades and how keep questioning how I work with it. Putting one’s privilege to use – is that enough? How do we ensure the broken systems we are part of are looked at and worked with. Can we use the role and privilege to bring in pockets of change, so we see transformation in the systems we are part of. These are the questions i ask myself. At the end of each year i feel the work done is so little.
” Transformation can’t be packaged. It is where exchange happens – emotional or intellectual. something shifts”. Loved this part. Thank you.
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Very powerful article Vartika. Read a couple of times and still absorbing. Some deep questions it asks and compels to reflect upon.
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